April 30th Luca tries to reach 2.5m on his toes
Luca threw a ball up above his large 2.5m-high closet.
– Maman, ma balle elle est au-dessus. Elle est coincée [mumy, my ball is stuck up there]
– Well, how can you get it back?
He stretches his arms up, somehow convinced that by getting on his toes with his arm up and can reach 2.5m. He stretches all he can, reaching for the top. After a few seconds he turns to me, surprised that he couldn’t see his ball all the way up 2.5m
– Je suis trop petit, he says very surprised … Je vais chercher un tabouret dans la cuisine [I’m too short…. I’m going to grab a stool in the kitchen]
He carries his little plastic stool from teh kitchen to the bedroom and sets it right by the closet. He climbs up on it and reaches up.
– Je suis encore trop petit… Je vais prendre un outil [I’m still too short… I’m going to grab a tool]
He grabs a plastic hammer from his toolkit, climbs back up on the stool, reaches up with the hammer
– C’est encore trop petit…. Je vais essayer un autre outil [still too short… will try another tool]
And he repeats with other tools, still surprised that it doesnt work…
– Luca, I say, we’ll need a ladder for that. I’ll grab one downstairs tomorrow.
– Mais l’échelle est elle plus grande que l’armoire. Tu vas faire comment ? But the ladder is taller than the closet. How will you do it?
– I will stop before the top and reach for your ball
– Tu vas aller dans le trou de l’échelle? Will you go through the holes of the ladder?
April 28th Maman, pourquoi toi cravaille?
For the last 2 months, every time I come back from work, Mia asks the same question :
– Maman, asks Mia, t’es ou toi? [where are you ?]
– I was at work
– Ahhhh, she says, as if all the details from the day suddenly made sense
April 10th Les bisous qui me genent
– Luca : Les bisous qui me genent, je les prends et je les pousse
– Maman : Some kisses bother you ?
– Oui. C’est les bisous qui piquent. Ils me genent. Il y a qque chose dedans. Si il reste dans le bisou il me gene, alors moi je l’enleve pour pas que ca me gene.
April 8th Mes cheveux
Luca : « Mes cheveux il faut les brosser comme ca (en avant) et apres comme ca (en arriere). IL faut faire ca pour enlever les boucles »
April 1st Padi parties in Russia
– Papa: Luca, are you going to get married when you grow up
– Luca: Oui (Yes)
– To whom?
– Mia [of course]
– You cant get married to mia. She’s your sister, you cant marry your sister
After a few back & forth, it was established Luca couldn’t marry his sister
– Papa: So, who will you marry?
– Luca: Hummm. Tonton Etienne [definition of marriage: spend time with somebody cool who plays with me]
– Well, you cant marry tonton Etienne. He’s already married to tata mathilde. Who else?
– Tata Mathilde
– [Anand gives up and changes topic] Where will you live?
– A paris
– Will you have kids?
– Oui (yes)
– Who will take care of your kids?
– Farida. Et moi je ne vais jamais aller au travail (Farida [the nanny]. And I will never go to work)
– Pourquoi ?
– Je ne vais jamais aller au travail, comme Padi (I will never go to work, like Padi [Luca’s grandpa])
– Like Padi?
– But Padi goes to work Luca
– Non, Padi il va en Russie. (no, Padi goes to Russia)
March 30th Can’t carry myself
I hear a “hahaha in Luca’s room. It’s 10pm. When I open the door to check what’s going on, Luca is sitting in his bed.
– Luca: Maman, pourquoi j’arrive pas à me porter? (why cant I carry myself ?)
– Maman: What do you mean you cant carry yourself ?
– Quand me m’attrappe comme ca [he puts his arms around himself], j’arrive pas à me porter [he moves his shoulders up and check if the rest of the body is moving up too] (wen I catch myself like that, I cant carry myself up)
I try to explain a few rough, inarticulate words to explain gravity to my child. But I basically laugh at the question and tell him I don’t know why.
Of course, he asks the same question to his dad in the morning. Anand puts his arm around himself and jumps up and down to the kitchen saying
– Papa: see, Luca, I can carry myself
– Luca: Maman, papa he can carry himself.
Ah, the papa hero….
March 29th chasing the cold in bed
– Luca: maman, pourquoi le froid dans le lit il se sauve? (why does the cold in my bed runs away ?)
– Maman : what do you mean ?
– Quand je viens au lit, le froid il est la. Apres, le froid il part par la couverture et le chaud il vient. Pourquoi le froid il part ? Moi j’aime bien le froid. (when I come to bed, the cold is here. Then, it goes away from the blanket and the warm comes. Why does the cold go away? I like the cold)
– It’s because your body is warm so you warm up the blanket and it becomes less cold
– [incredulous] Mais quand je viens, le lit il est froid. Apres il se sauve. Alors moi je bouge vers le froid, mais le chaud il vient encore. Et je bouge vers le froid encore, mais le chaud il vient toujours (when I come, the bed is cold. Then it goes away. So I move towards the cold, but the hot comes again. And I move towards the cold again, but the hot comes always)
– [mamand blank]
– Moi j’aime bien le froid et la pluie, he concludes (I like cold and rain)
March 28th Almost fallen
– Luca : Maman, j’ai failli glissé mais après, mais après, mais après, j’ai remis mes jambs debout. [pause]. C’est dur ca, de glisser et remettre ses jambes.
March 26th The cap did not fall back
– Luca: Maman, le bouchon de Mia je l’ai lance jusqu’en haut et il n’est pas tombé (I threw Mia’s cap but it did not fall back)
– What do you mean it did not fall back ?
– Luca: il est pas revenue (it did not fall back)
– Hum. You threw it up there and it did not come back?
– Yes. Je l’ai lance et il est pas tombé. Il est sur le frigo (I threw it and it did not come back)
I walk to the fridge and the cap of Mia’s bottle is stuck on top of the fridge. I stretch to grab it
– Est ce que tu es grande jusqu’au frigo? (I you as tall as the fridge)
– Yes, I can catch the cap on top of the fridge
– Et moi je suis grand comme le frigo ? (and me ? am I as tall as the fridge ?)
– Do you think so?
– Non. Moi je peux attrapper jusque la [he stretches out on his toes]. Mais bientôt je suis grand comme papa. Papa il est grand comme le frigo ? (no, I can catch up to there. But soon I am as tall as papa)
A few hours earlier, we had measured Luca. 1.03m. Waho. He tried to make sense of the meter (80, 90, 100, 110, 120cm) and couldn’t find 103. Confusing.
March 15th Mia should be scolded but I crack up
– Maman: Mia, I’m done with you today. Either you finish up your plate, or you’re done with dinner and you go to your bedroom to play. What do you want?
– Mia: Huuuu. Clementine
March 10th Luca takes a photo of Mia
Luca is trying to take a photo of Mia with his little camera (a real one, gift from Manali and Kedar).
– Luca: J’arrive pas a voir mia, elle bouge trop (“I cant see Mia, she moves too much”) [pause, while he tries to focus the camera on his sister]. Mia, arrête de bouger trop! (Mia, stop moving so much!)
March 9th Ap’es, c’est fini
Forwarded the article to my mum, a quite representative French lady. She said “clearly, this lady never came to my house when I was raising 3 kids”.
Sophie says “clealry, I am more an American mom than a French one”.
This weekend, Mia decided she wouldnt sleep for her nap and would instead talk and sing to her brother (in the same room) so he couldnt sleep either. She grabbed anything she could reach and threw them across the room.
When we showed up at 4pm to wake them up, we were dead serious and ready to scold the little girl
– Mia, have you slept at all?
– Why did you not sleep?
– C’est comme ca (that’s the way it is)
Anand and I just couldnt resist – we burst out laughing in front of her. So she just learned that she can skip her nap, make sure her brother does the same, throw toys and stuffed animals across the room, and get away with it by cracking up a joke. Now that’s French education at its best.
– Mia, you need to sleep now
– Une histoire. Ap’es, c’est fini [one more story, after it’s over]